In-Person vs Online Therapy: Which Should You Choose?
Hello to all my underpaid, overworked family project managers. Here’s what your internal debate about online vs. in-person therapy tells me: you’re flirting with the idea of finally prioritizing yourself. I mean, why else would you search for “in-person therapist near me” when you could have just as easily looked up “online therapist in Missouri,” right?
Let’s be real: you’re leaning toward in-person (even if you’re not sure why), but there’s that nagging appeal of how convenient online could be.
You didn’t ask for my two cents (except you did, by clicking on this article), so let me break down what’s worth knowing here and what I think might help you decide.
Why Choose In-Person Therapy?
1 - Making Space for Yourself - Literally
Showing up for in-person therapy is a real-life boundary that says, "My needs matter." Picture it: you get in the car, leaving behind the reminders of unfinished tasks, and step into a room where you and your needs aren’t one of the things you’re focusing on—they’re the only thing we’re focusing on. It’s an hour a week without interruptions.
2- Feeling the Energy in the Room
Being face-to-face isn’t just about seeing your therapist’s expressions; it’s about the entire vibe. Ever notice how just being around someone truly present feels different? In-person therapy gives you a chance to feel that energy, to hear the nuances in your therapist’s voice, to catch the subtle non-verbal cues. Therapy isn’t a transaction; it’s an experience. And for anyone used to “performing” or putting on a brave face, in-person connection can be deeply healing.
3 - The Power of Ritual
In-person therapy can become an anchor in your week—a grounding ritual that’s all about creating space for you. From the moment you grab your keys, drive over, park, and walk into that room, you’re setting everything else aside. There’s the quiet pause in the waiting room, the familiarity of the therapy space, and even the drive back—a time to process, decompress, and let things settle before re-engaging with life. When life feels like it’s running you, a ritual like getting to your session and settling in can feel like one of the few choices you’re actively making for you.
When In-Person Therapy Might Be the Best Fit:
You’re looking to establish a self-care routine that doesn’t get shuffled to “maybe later.”
Between Teams notifications, the dog barking, and the laundry you were gonna finally get to today, you know you’ll be distracted otherwise
The idea of sharing a room, not just a screen, feels like it will allow you to create a better connection with your therapist.
You want a tangible way to mark that this time as yours.
Why Online Therapy?
1 - When Life Won’t Let You Take a Breather
Let’s be honest—there are days where leaving just isn’t in the cards and it’s not a matter of boundaries or priorities. Your kid’s home with a fever or your boss's boss threw a last-minute “mandatory meeting” on your calendar - smack dab in the middle of your drive time. Online therapy can help you keep your session instead of having to cancel and find a time to reschedule.
2 - Broader Options, On Your Terms
Sometimes the right therapist for you isn’t close by, or maybe they’re in high demand. Online therapy breaks that barrier, letting you connect with the person who actually gets it, no matter where they are. If the goal is to find someone who feels like a true match, online therapy opens up the possibility of finding that fit beyond your zip code. Online therapy can mean the difference between settling for someone convenient and someone right for you.
When Online Therapy Might Be the Best Fit:
Your schedule feels like a game of Tetris, and carving out drive time just isn’t doable.
There are limited local options, and you’re ready to prioritize the quality of the therapist over physical proximity.
Flexibility is key for you—you need an option that won’t fall through when life gets messy.
Online vs In Person Therapy - My Recommendation:
In my practice, I find the best approach is often a hybrid—primarily meeting in person to create that grounding, dedicated space, with the option to pivot to virtual sessions when life demands it. In-person sessions give us that powerful, uninterrupted time where therapy becomes a consistent ritual. But having online sessions available when needed—whether for a sick kid, an urgent work call, or a packed schedule—means therapy doesn’t have to take a backseat when things get tight.
Ultimately, this choice is about what best supports you. If you’re looking for a routine that’s centered entirely around you, in-person might be your answer. But if flexibility is what you need to keep showing up consistently, online therapy is there as a reliable alternative.
The point is, you’re already making a shift by choosing therapy; both options are valid paths that bring you closer to the change you’re looking for.
Find Therapists in St Louis, MO Today
So, as you weigh your options, consider this: How do you want to show up for yourself right now?
Either way, I’m here to make this work with you—screen or no screen, session by session, until prioritizing you feels like second nature. Contact me today to book a free consultation or to learn more about the practice today.
I offer IFS therapy online and in person for individuals, women, and therapists who live in Missouri.
