UNFILTERED:

Making the Invisible, Visible

If therapy and Fight Club have a common thread, it's their first rule: don't talk about it. This code works wonders if you're in the loop, but it's less helpful when you're on the sidelines, contemplating whether or not to step into the ring.

Think of these articles as your insider's guide to therapy.

I'll offer you a candid view of my work as a therapist, without sacrificing the sacredness of my client's confidentiality. Like your favorite reality TV show, we'll delve into the highs, lows, and 'pour-the-red-wine' moments of life for women in their 30s and 40s.

I'm pulling back the curtain on the invisible world of therapy for women who think their struggles aren't "significant enough", one blog post at a time.

IFS, Therapy, Enneagram KARISSA MUELLER IFS, Therapy, Enneagram KARISSA MUELLER

The Two Most Important Things You Don't Know About Yourself (But Should)

Most people have zero clue WHY they do what they do - not with any real accuracy, anyway. We stumble through life on autopilot, reacting to situations with a vague sense of "because I should" or "because that's just me."

Spoiler alert: Surface-level explanations don’t cut it. You might tell yourself you procrastinate "because I'm lazy" or snap at a colleague "because they're annoying." These explanations feel true on the surface, but they don't address the root cause.



But guess what? There's a way to break free from behaviors, habits, or feelings you feel trapped by: and it starts with identifying two of the most important things about you.

Read More
IFS, Therapy KARISSA MUELLER IFS, Therapy KARISSA MUELLER

How Long Does it Take for IFS to Work?

Asking how long therapy will take is like asking how long it will take to get through security at the airport: it varies, and it’s often a bit longer than you’d like. However, in my opinion, it’s more pleasant and certainly more rewarding than any interaction with TSA. Just saying.

Read More
KARISSA MUELLER KARISSA MUELLER

Parenting with IFS: Resources for Creativity and Play for St. Louis Transplants

Listen, St. Louis Natives - I think I speak for all transplants when I say that we, respectfully, don’t want to know where you went to high school. As 30 and 40-year-old women with busy lives, we’d much rather hear about where you spend your time now. In fact - those of us with kids NEED to hear about where you spend your time now. Let me explain. 

Read More
IFS KARISSA MUELLER IFS KARISSA MUELLER

The Good Woman's Guide To Not Taking Things Personally

IFS therapy is like sitting down with your inner drama queen and gently asking "What's happening that you are making such a fuss?" You're not shutting her up; you're giving her a microphone. And guess what? When you let her speak - when you help her feel heard - she won’t need to wield a megaphone anymore.

Read More
IFS KARISSA MUELLER IFS KARISSA MUELLER

The #1 Way You Gaslight Yourself - And How To Stop

I created Good Woman Therapy to introduce women like you to the idea that we are good inside because it can relieve our most common struggles by freeing us from believing that those struggles have turned us into one of the “bad ones”.

Because that, my friend, is how you are gaslighting yourself. Here’s how to stop: consider the idea that you are one woman, with many parts, all of whom are inherently good - and that changes everything.

Read More
IFS KARISSA MUELLER IFS KARISSA MUELLER

The Gift of Curiosity in Conflict

Curiosity works because when it's genuine, it's truly agenda-free. Ever notice how when you're frustrated with yourself about why you do XYZ thing in conflict, you get 0% closer to figuring out why you do that thing? Or to...not doing it anymore?

That's because the part of you doing the thing you hate feels defensive; you're trying to change it before truly understanding it.

Read More
Therapy KARISSA MUELLER Therapy KARISSA MUELLER

Dealing with Difficult Feelings

Sometimes, my job as a therapist is to share a hard truth with clients. Today, I’ll cut right to it: dealing with difficult feelings starts by learning that your feelings are real – and – they may not be reflective of reality. it's okay to feel a certain way, even if it doesn't fully align with the reality of the situation, and it's important not to invalidate your emotions because they're a part of you. This introspective process can be empowering, liberating, and ultimately, healing.

Read More
IFS, Therapy KARISSA MUELLER IFS, Therapy KARISSA MUELLER

Having Feelings About Your Feelings

"Both can be true" - this is a little nugget I offer to clients when they are torn between their feelings and their feelings about their feelings (humans are unique in that way). When we dig into those struggles, most clients describe experiencing a tug-of-war going on inside of them.

Read More